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Chatty, mischievous and evolving over with time. I am trying to make sense of everything around me and having loads of fun along the way! Oh, I want to be a better person along the way.

Monday, July 6, 2009

You (The First Part)

I have thought long and hard about this and this keeps coming back. I do wish I could say this to your face but it can only hurt both of us. You will be too upset to see the truth of my words.

When you called to tell me I should come over, it was very urgent. I came running despite the fact that I was writing exams. I think a part of me knew what you were going to say.

I met you in a friend's house. You looked a tad unkempt. Then you said it. I think that was a defining moment in our relationship. I could not believe you could be that stupid and repeat the same mistake.

You said you suspect you are pregnant!

This is not the first time. It happened before and the guy in question exhibited his true colours. He got another girl pregnant around the same time, so basically you were on your own.

Things went back to normal when you lost the baby. I was relieved in truth. With the baby went the guy.

Then you met this latest excuse for a man.

We all expressed our misgivings but you insisted and indeed was quite upset about our attitude towards him. We knew his past even told you but you like a dog that wants to get lost refused to listen to the hunter's whistle.

We reached a compromise. We will all try to be polite to him, so as not to hurt your feelings.

Then it happened. Even after all the pro-choice arrangements you had with him simply because he likes it 'skin-to-skin' How stupid can you be?

This latest predicament occurred and pronto he left for his 'master's' leaving you to bear it alone. And you made this decision of Pro-life.
That they told you in church not to go pro-choice is the lamest thing you have evr said. Please lady save the trash for someone who actually believes it. If you had been told that, you had no business being sexually active or at least protect yourself if you must do it.

It's been 3 yrs and he has refused to come back! You are alone with the child. You didn't complete your education and you do the stupidest of things. Like dropping out of school. Wrting university exams that you will come up with inane excuses not to attend if offered admission. Expecting the friend caucus to always pick up your peices.

I am done. I hate seeing you this way but please it's time you faced up to your responsibilities. Get a grip, a job and stop wallowing in self pity! It's downright annoying and you put yourself in this situation.

We have all tried and frankly we have lives too. Mine certainly doesn't revolve around you. I need a life of my own not having you mentioned with your latest bout of foolishnes mentioned at every friend gathering.

The child, you have turned into a brat. You don't ascertain any sign of discipline you just let her do anything she wants. Then you beleive the 'guy' is coming back to you. He didn't even have anyone representing him or his family at the 1st year celebration! Not to talk of the common decency of seeing his child have enough food. He renewed his visa without letting you know. And you have the audacity to say you will only bear his kids and make statemnts like 'when we have our second child'

When the heck will you wake up? I am just sick of being depressed by you so before I scream in your face I will take a step away. Yes that is what I will do. I will help you when I can.

Sorry people for the long post but this is what I want to say to one of my friends. Sorry for the errors I can't do any spell checks. I might end up deleting the post. Have a fab week!

On a very happy note- I got my Storm! It is everything I wanted and more. :D.


NaijaBabe said...

Oh dear!

NaijaBabe said...

Pele. It's quite hard when people do not listen to you and it hurts that their lives are paying for it! What can you do? It's a sad case

Bibi said...

I was just reading this and going, mschew, mschew, mschew. But you're right. She did put herself in that situation. But I think she's in denial. But on the other hand, she needs to get a grip on her life. I know how I feel when a friend just constantly makes the wrong decisions. Maybe you should tell her SOME of the things you just said here. Some. lol

tunrayo said...

Sounds like your friend needs an intervention. I think you guys need to talk to her about how you feel at least once. Even if it falls on deaf ears.

And its alright to want to take that step back. I really dont think anybody should endure all this at the expense of their own happiness.

Congratulations on the storm btw. I want!!!

Anonymous said...

This is err..rather sad.

Im upset just reading it sef...
Why do women behave like this biko??

Anonymous said...

first time here......i hope your friend gets things together. not only for her well being but for her daughter. If the guy some how returns fine but if not she still needs to move on.

p.s. Welcome to the blackberry family!!!!

doll said...

my dear...dont drink panadol for anoda person's headache...its theri life...their choice

LusciousRon said...

Naijababe: It really is. I just tire.

Bibi: Only some? I really wish!

Tunrayo: Thank you. I remember another freind tried she was blanked for weeks. I am just going to be on the outside and hope she gets it someday soon. I even employed a mutual male freind to do the talking but it's all on deaf ears.

Brokeass: Search me o. We act so insensible atimes it's incredible!

FrankieRose: I do hope so. Thanks for stopping by and the welcome.

Doll: I like your take on things. I sure won't be taking that panadol with the current state of my mind.

Funms-the rebirth said...

uve let things gone too far with her...i think u all should sit her down and speak ur minds....harsh or not, people hate hearing the truth but it will surely set free

Original Mgbeke said...

You have definitely had it up to here and I don't blame you. The truth is a bitter and hard pill to swallow and I think that you should let her know this. She might love you for your honesty or hate you for it, but ultimately one day she will look back and know that you told her the truth and it will be off your mind and your conscience.
Good luck with this relationship sha.

Anonymous said...

I like what you have decided. Stay on the outside for now and if she needs help then help. Its actually better for her. You lot have been enabling her destructive behaviour. Time to remove yourself from all that. Goodluck! and xoxo

Writefreak said...

This is a tough situation and i wonder why this friend won't do something about her life...i reckon she's still a bit young.
I think you need to tell her the TRUTH. If you can't say it face to face, write it to her and let her know you're trying to understand her but she needs to take action and responsibility for her life!

LusciousRon said...

Funms: I agree. Once I get the courage to break away for real I will do that.

Original Mgbeke: Thank you. It goes either way.

Temite: I am really chewing on this one. I just find it hard.

Writefreak: I wonder too. She is not young actually. late 20's now. A word written is permanent. Saying it is a better way I think.

Buttercup said...

It's such a damn shame. I can totally understand why you'd be fed up..

Honeywell said...

wow....babe, to be honest, i dont blame you for being frustrated...but please dont cut her off completely...like u said, if she needs help, you can help. But honestly, you can talk till you are blue. In this kind of situation, only God can wake her up from her sleep, so the best thing you can so for her is pray...

Anonymous said...

when i was readin this i was getting so angry and furstrated eh..ugh!!!u need to grab her and shake somesense into her!!and u guys r tiptoeing around her thats y she hasnt gotten to her senses yet..mscheww!

InCogNaija said...

thats quite sad...i hope ur friend wakes up and smells the zobo.


First off, I am jealous that you have a Blackberry Storm.

Now that that is out of the way. I must admit that I am not easily shocked, but this shocked me. Please for your sanity, create serious distance from this babe. Be there for her when you can, but, don't let her wahala bring you down. It is the child I truly feel sorry for. She needs the attention and discipline of a dedicated mother. I hope that your friend, who is in fact our sister (in the general sense) gets it together for her daughter's sake. We can't have that child repeat the errors of her parents. Please do what you can for the child.


~Sirius~ said...

My, oh My.

WTH men!

I hope the scales covering her eyes come off really soon.

Do I hear UberTwitter?

Welcome to the club.