Orisirisi revised

I am at work but things are pretty slow at the moment. I have work to do o, just can't be bothered at this time. I am still smarting from the queue at the NYSC office. To submit PC now is war especially if its the last day. Chei.

See me in my very tigh-high-waisted-just-before-the-knee-skirt with nice large purple belt over my ruffled top plus a two-tone purple banana heeled shoe. Abeg I can't shout. Na so I remember say I suppose submit PC for this month so I can get my stipend from govt.

Thank God I always have my kit in the car I just went to change na so dey ruin my fine girl today. I was ready to do the waka, see client, generally pose all over the place thing and I wasted the better part of 3 hrs at that damn place! Thank God my boss wasn't around I would have been in deep sh*t.

On the queue couldn't remember my no on the list na so the winch comot me for line to say I was pissed na another thing. Sha she got up to do something I just jeje flip the booklet to find my name and number before she came back. I went back to join the queue sha, the fine boy I was eye-balling no gree give me space in front of him. I don't know the kind beef she get for my face as she see me again she said I didn't write my account number well, bla bla bla. I just left after all her talk. See the crowd and before you find your bank...... Phew.

Getting to where I parked some olodos had blocked me and I didn't see myself waiting for nobody to come move their cars, I just jejely checked if the cars were in park mode and manual, I saw a friend of mine and I told him to let's roll the cars a bit forward so we could go. Na so I comot for the place o! I can imagine the expression on people's faces when they look for their cars and can't find it where they left it.

I have a presentation at work tomorrow and I haven't even prepared the paper. Na wah for me.
I logged on to fb this morning only to find a msg from one fine bloke I met a while ago at the conference, (he has a girlfriend remember?), he said: 'hey hot chocolate', I am like 'excuse me?'
I refused to call him when he didn't call even though he is really cute plus he has a girlfriend. I no want bottle for my head. I want to remain fine girl till I am sixty, ask Oprah.

So I was talking to one old flame who thinks he still has a chance, I will call him 'agbaya'
Agbaya: Are you still slim and slender?
Luscious: No I have gained weight duh. (Just kidding)
Agbaya: That's nice you will be more handy for my 'use'

I am like have you lost it or what? What arrant nonsense? I was so angry I hung up on him. I mean what kind of yeye talk is that? Hell will freeze over first before that!

Anyways I sufficiently calmed down enough to pick his call later and I gave him a piece of my mind. When did I become a tool to be used?
People really should learn speech manners and choose their words carefully.

Which reminds of one idiot in my office who says I eat too much and I am gaining weight. Yeah so I love cookies, chocolates etc its nobody's business what I put in my mouth. Its safer for me than real food another food poisoning I don't want! At least I need something to sustain me while I work. So this fool repeats it every time he sees me munching, That I was really slim and pretty when I started work and more body won't fit me. Where does he get off saying that rubbish to me?

I weigh 52kg! Where in the world does that qualify as overweight. My mother hugs me by the side and her arm encompasses my whole waist and this idiot says that! Everyone says I should gain more weight including my aunt who has 6 grown children and is just a little bit fatter than I am!

I just told him to stuff his comments where the sun doesn't shine. Opinion is an arsehole everybody has one! Thank God I am not insecure about my body I would have been upset. I told him not to say anything to me again except maybe greetings. We still have to work together. I would have reported him to HR sef but I just chilled.

Anyways I am going back to work let me earn the bandwidth time I have spent.